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Don’t drink the chamomile tea
I haven’t been able to drink chamomile tea since 1984 when I was a judge on the Miss Alaska beauty pageant. Being something of an expert in the art of deportment, I was asked to spend some time with...
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Bad eggs
There was a woman called Jill Carter who used to come to my church. When there was a bring-and-buy, she never brought anything. When there was a bake sale, she never baked anything. When there was a...
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In which David Brooks embarrasses himself again…
David Brooks came to visit us at the Shady Pines Home for the Violently Senile in about 2006. He was invited to give a little talk by the Chairman of our management board, Doctor Phelps. This was, of...
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Putting the crazy in “crazy eyes”
Twice the crazy at half the price I met Michele Bachmann back in about 1993 when she was setting up her New Heights Charter School in Stillwater. From day one, she was skimming the cream off the books....
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Holding the tiger by the tail
I see that little Scotty Walker has been in the news in Wisconsin trying to stomp on unions. Now, I’m a lifelong Good Republican Woman. I voted for Alf Landon and every Republican candidate since...
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And we’ll all be blind and eating salmon paste sandwiches…
A few years ago, we went on a bus excursion to Janesville, Wisconsin. If I remember correctly we were going to see the Lincoln-Tallman House, in which Abraham Lincoln slept for all of two nights. That...
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Alpha dog, my arse
Cesar Milan once came to Shady Pines because Muriel Heppelthwaite’s dear little pug was having dominance issues. Every time the nurse tried to take the doggy off Muriel’s lap to clean up the urine...
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In which Sarah gets shunted onto an Alaska Airlines flight to Anchorage with...
Those few of you who have been reading my little stories from the beginning would recall the time I spoke about a young Sarah Heath-but-soon-to-be-Palin and her generosity with the chamomile tea at...
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The Convent Fair and what happened there
My dears, this story, being a religious story, is almost certainly not suitable for children – unless, of course, you have the sort of troublesome child who could stand, every now and then, to read a...
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The Spokane Horror, Part 2 or, Whatever Happened to Huck and Ann?
Well, my dears. It has been a busy week and, although I promised you I would finish my little story about Pastor Huckabee and the Convent Fair last night, other circumstances intervened and I have...
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